I swear life is turning to schmidt.
First up, Syria are being a_wipes and getting told off by The United Stated of America International Police. Guys, we know you have a trillion-dollar military, but you don't need to find excuses to sue it. You don't even NEED it.
Secondly, I just saw Star Trek, Into Darkness. IT was terrible, saved only by the superiority of Benedict Cumberbach. He. Is. The. Best. Actor. Ever (contested by only R. Downey Jr, Depp and diCaprio).
And also, just to top off a stupidly stupid few days, Katy Perry has ripped off Lorde. Lorde started the craze of all-vocals, next-to-no-actual music singing with Royals, Tennis Court and Love Club. So Katy Perry goes and throws out Roar, which is slightly heavier than Lorde but only slightly. Damn Katy, no life.
So anyway, life is rapidly sinking. And when life begins to rapidly sink, you do two things. Drown your sorrows, and make a list. Just a random list. So today, everyone, I introduce to you...
TOP STUPID STUFF
5. The 2DS. Honestly, come up with an original name, Nintendo. Thats all on this subject.
4. Miley Cyrus "twerking". Everyone knows that if you truly want to lose the Disney, star in Spring Breakers. She didn't and this is how she made up for it. Although I wouldn't mind being Robin Thicke right now...
3. Tony Abbot's election campaign. He literally said" Vote for me, my daughters are hot." I thought that Julia Gillard was bad, but this is a whole new level of campaigning.
2. The Americas Cup. This is the luxury of ridiculously rich people spending enough money on a stupid sport to rebuild Christchurch, or send me to Mars. Also, there are now only two competitors. New Zealand (more ingenuity than money because NZ is poor as shit) and America. PS America's losing. And will lose.
1. But number one, as of today, must go to...Reality TV
I was going to put cooking shows, then Dream home shows. But they're all stupid. MasterChef is stupid because it's COOKING. Remember, when you're making spag bol it's NOT THAT EXCITING. And building a house just should NOT be worthy of a television program. I mean, all it does is say I AM BETTER THAN YOU AT LIFE. Also, Also, X Factor doesn't produce good singers. The only good reality show is Wipeout, because it's Wipeout.
Done for now. Bye.
