Yay. Just got the new Skulduggery Pleasant book. Do tell me I read too much, because I do. Do tell me I watch too much Geordie Shore and Big Bang Theory, because I do. Don't tell me to be ashamed of it.
BECAUSE I NEVER WILL BE.
(because Geordie Shore is just too hilariously idiotic to ignore)
PS the book is really long.
Thursday 29 August 2013
Tuesday 13 August 2013
Tech Shit
Hello, Minions.
It's getting lonely here. So I have taken it upon myself to do something. And that something is...
MOST STUPID TECH SHIT 2012-2013
Lets go.
1. Blackberry Z10. Nobody wanted a touchscreen from Blackberry, as it would be crap. So they did it anyway. And hola, it was shit. No Android, a bulky, horrid handset, sitting beside the iPhone in Worst Operating Systems Ever.
2. iPad Mini. This was the most pathetic game of catch-up ever. Apple knew they had to do it, and yet they failed. No Retina display (obviously so they could add it next year and call it revolutionary), a 5mp camera begging to be upgraded to 8mp in 2013, and most of all, it was only ten bucks more expensive than the cheapest iPod Touch. So...either Apple are making a huge loss on the Mini, or (more likely) massively overpricing the iPod.
3. This wasn't actually a 2012-2013 device, but it was so ridiculous it deserves mocking. Zune. Microsoft Zune. A rival to iPod, it flopped. Nobody wanted it, as Apple had well and truly taken the non-cellular entertainment device market to a 100% share. Microsoft, stick to Windows. You do most things better than Apple, but don't combat iPod. iPod is, and for the foreseeable future will be, king. And queen, for you stupid feminist people that insist I should stay home and cook and clean while women change tyres and drink beer.
4. Mozilla Firefox phone. Thats right. An OS based on Firefox. Lets not even get started.
5. And...yes, I will do it. iPhone 5. The iPhone needed a major reboot, and thats not what happened. What happened was a ridiculously lengthened screen, with no other upgrade AT ALL. Come on. I hate Apple, but surely they won't stop THERE. I expected a 13-15mp camera. A flash new set of shit to play with. Something else. Heres the difference between Apple and Samsung. Apple work something amazing out and say "We'll drag it out. What if we run out of new ideas, what will we do then?" Samsung go "Heres a genius new idea, create an entirely new phone around it and also include it in the Galaxy S4/S5/S6 whatever.
Yarp
It's getting lonely here. So I have taken it upon myself to do something. And that something is...
MOST STUPID TECH SHIT 2012-2013
Lets go.
1. Blackberry Z10. Nobody wanted a touchscreen from Blackberry, as it would be crap. So they did it anyway. And hola, it was shit. No Android, a bulky, horrid handset, sitting beside the iPhone in Worst Operating Systems Ever.
2. iPad Mini. This was the most pathetic game of catch-up ever. Apple knew they had to do it, and yet they failed. No Retina display (obviously so they could add it next year and call it revolutionary), a 5mp camera begging to be upgraded to 8mp in 2013, and most of all, it was only ten bucks more expensive than the cheapest iPod Touch. So...either Apple are making a huge loss on the Mini, or (more likely) massively overpricing the iPod.
3. This wasn't actually a 2012-2013 device, but it was so ridiculous it deserves mocking. Zune. Microsoft Zune. A rival to iPod, it flopped. Nobody wanted it, as Apple had well and truly taken the non-cellular entertainment device market to a 100% share. Microsoft, stick to Windows. You do most things better than Apple, but don't combat iPod. iPod is, and for the foreseeable future will be, king. And queen, for you stupid feminist people that insist I should stay home and cook and clean while women change tyres and drink beer.
4. Mozilla Firefox phone. Thats right. An OS based on Firefox. Lets not even get started.
5. And...yes, I will do it. iPhone 5. The iPhone needed a major reboot, and thats not what happened. What happened was a ridiculously lengthened screen, with no other upgrade AT ALL. Come on. I hate Apple, but surely they won't stop THERE. I expected a 13-15mp camera. A flash new set of shit to play with. Something else. Heres the difference between Apple and Samsung. Apple work something amazing out and say "We'll drag it out. What if we run out of new ideas, what will we do then?" Samsung go "Heres a genius new idea, create an entirely new phone around it and also include it in the Galaxy S4/S5/S6 whatever.
Yarp
Wednesday 7 August 2013
Jono & Ben
Uh, hi.
I really have no idea why I thought about this crap. It may or may not have something to do with the fact that it popped up while I was in a social studies reliever class, where we did absolutely nothing for 50 minutes straight. I'd like to know why learning about Jews emigrating to Palestine is any use to anybody going through the NZ education system, by the way.
Anyway, that not the point. My first whinge (spellcheck thinks whinge isnt a word. It IS.), is that of sandflies and God. And death. They are related through the prospect that all things go to heaven. Rabbits, humans, whatever. Anyway, if we kill a sand-fly, it's going to be waiting for us in heaven or hell or whatever. So I have just realised that slapping a sand-fly against a car window not only will condemn me for killing an animal, it also condemns me to eternity with that damn sand-fly, where it cannot be killed. Stupid religion. NOBODY LIKED YOU ANYWAY, GOD.
Oh and by the way, for all you who buy free-range eggs, think about what you're really supporting. You're supporting animal equality. You want chickens to have a good life.
So if you must have animal equality, stop now and never, ever stand on a spider again. Or slap a sandfly. OR whatever. You want animal equality. You can bloody have it. All being equal is communism, and everyone knows communism is impossible. Im. Po. Ssi. Ble. So go on, animal communists. Be like that. Because vegetarianism isn't showing a greater-good heroism for animals, it's showing your lack of intelligence to see that communism never has, and never will work. It's basically walking around with a gigantic hat saying HERES AN IDIOT, BEAT THE LIVING SHIT OUT OF HIM!!!!!
I'm done for the moment, except for my latest YouTube thing. Jono and Ben. They're Kiwis, so the stuff they do is local, and hilarious. I'll post one of my personal favourites below, and another with my next post.
WATCH IT. Its awesomeness.
I really have no idea why I thought about this crap. It may or may not have something to do with the fact that it popped up while I was in a social studies reliever class, where we did absolutely nothing for 50 minutes straight. I'd like to know why learning about Jews emigrating to Palestine is any use to anybody going through the NZ education system, by the way.
Anyway, that not the point. My first whinge (spellcheck thinks whinge isnt a word. It IS.), is that of sandflies and God. And death. They are related through the prospect that all things go to heaven. Rabbits, humans, whatever. Anyway, if we kill a sand-fly, it's going to be waiting for us in heaven or hell or whatever. So I have just realised that slapping a sand-fly against a car window not only will condemn me for killing an animal, it also condemns me to eternity with that damn sand-fly, where it cannot be killed. Stupid religion. NOBODY LIKED YOU ANYWAY, GOD.
Oh and by the way, for all you who buy free-range eggs, think about what you're really supporting. You're supporting animal equality. You want chickens to have a good life.
So if you must have animal equality, stop now and never, ever stand on a spider again. Or slap a sandfly. OR whatever. You want animal equality. You can bloody have it. All being equal is communism, and everyone knows communism is impossible. Im. Po. Ssi. Ble. So go on, animal communists. Be like that. Because vegetarianism isn't showing a greater-good heroism for animals, it's showing your lack of intelligence to see that communism never has, and never will work. It's basically walking around with a gigantic hat saying HERES AN IDIOT, BEAT THE LIVING SHIT OUT OF HIM!!!!!
I'm done for the moment, except for my latest YouTube thing. Jono and Ben. They're Kiwis, so the stuff they do is local, and hilarious. I'll post one of my personal favourites below, and another with my next post.
WATCH IT. Its awesomeness.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)